Growing up isn’t about age — it’s about who (or what) you experience as running your actions.

 A

TL;DR — Adult Development (It → This)

• Adult Development describes how people make meaning and what feels like the source of their actions.

• Development progresses through stages, each building on the last:

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It

• Actions feel determined by forces outside the self.

• “Anger came over me.”

• Default infant state.

I

• Actions feel self-determined.

• “Because I want to.”

• Emergence of personal agency.

We

• Actions shaped by close social group.

• “That’s what we do.”

• Awareness that others have different minds begins.

Us

• Identity tied to larger systems (religion, profession, ideology).

• “This is what people like us do.”

• Ability to adopt a structured worldview (“mindform”).

This

• Actions guided by broader context and trade-offs.

• “This is what the situation calls for.”

• Navigates multiple identities that can’t be neatly reconciled.

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Key Ideas

• Each stage depends on a “good enough” foundation of the previous one.

• People can mimic later stages or temporarily act from earlier ones.

• Multiple stages can be active at once; what matters is your center of gravity.

• Development can be uneven across life domains (work vs. relationships).

• Growth may be supported by:

  • Strong peer groups (moving from I → We)

  • Roles requiring complex trade-offs (Us → This)

• Assessing someone’s stage is inherently subjective and imprecise.

Bottom line:
Adult development is about the evolving structure of meaning-making — from impulse-driven action to context-aware integration of competing systems.