RD BK X Being listened to is a powerful motivator

 A

Here’s a summary in bullet quotes of key ideas from “Why We Do What We Do: Understanding Self-Motivation” by Edward L. Deci (with Richard Flaste):

---

📘 “Why We Do What We Do” – Key Quotes & Concepts (Bullet Summary)

• "Control is an illusion. Motivation that lasts comes from within."
  → True motivation is intrinsic, not from external rewards or punishments.

• "People are most motivated when they feel autonomous, competent, and connected."
  → These are the three core human needs: autonomy, competence, and relatedness.

• "Rewards can kill motivation."
  → External rewards often undermine intrinsic interest, especially in creative or meaningful tasks.

• "To motivate people effectively, stop trying to control them."
  → Autonomy-supportive environments lead to deeper engagement and performance.

• "Punishments and rewards are two sides of the same coin—control."
  → Both can foster compliance but not authentic self-direction.

• "When people feel forced, they resist. When they feel free, they thrive."
  → Freedom fosters ownership and internal commitment.

• "Motivation isn't about pushing people; it's about creating the conditions that let them push themselves."
  → Leaders, teachers, and parents should support autonomy, not impose will.

• "True learning comes from curiosity, not pressure."
  → Educational systems should nurture intrinsic interest, not grade-chasing.

• "Being listened to is a powerful motivator."
  → Empathy and understanding validate autonomy and strengthen motivation.

• "You can’t motivate others by force, only by helping them find their own reasons."
  → Long-term motivation is self-endorsed, not coerced.

---

Would you like a 1-page printable summary or visual version of this?